I read so much...and I subscribe to daily devotions...so I do visit with God daily...several times each day...I do. But, I haven't fallen to my knees in prayer in over 4 years. I can remember the last time, in fact. I was a single Mom...struggling, tired, and really lost. I felt so unsupported, and I can remember going into my bedroom, and just falling on my knees praying to God for wisdom, guidance, and resources to just make it. I'm here now to speak of this, so clearly we made it. God is very generous in that way. Never wavering, always there, true to His word...that is our God.
Yesterday in the sermon something hit me really hard, and I'm not sure what happened, but, God was sure speaking to my heart. I've felt the power and knocking of God many times, but, this was a bit different. This was very clear...very profound...and I listened. There is this woman in my life, and she will be there for a very long time I do believe. But, her and I never really got along...things are better than they were, but, still they will never be perfect..I'm just sure of it. God put it on my heart to do something nice for her. Hum...do something nice for someone who I feel has put me though so much agony!? Ugh...I'd rather not...that was the very "human" very un-Godly voice that washed over me...but, then....there came God again... He lightened my heart..and I took her a plant. This woman was grateful, and she was kind...dare I tell you, she was even complimentary..and I was of her also. God is amazing...and to you these are tiny baby-steps...but, they are tiny baby-steps toward something greater, and I am safe in saying it was God's will.
So, today, as my morning was chaos....Monday morning craziness, we all have it. But, once I got my 1 year old baby girl to nap (finally) I sat down to start reading a book...and, this book is a blessing. God was showing me that other mothers in this world are tired too! God was showing me through this book that other women are not perfect, either! These words in this book were a gift to me today...I sat down the few pages I had started reading...shut my front door....and right there...amiss the Lego's strewn about I was on my knees in prayer. This was different than it was 4 years ago. I was not in desperation...I was in gratitude....don't get me wrong, I was asking God for his guidance, wisdom, and continued grace in this season of my life....but, this was not a lost prayer. This was a prayer of thankfulness and request for continued blessings, this was a prayer for God to keep moving me toward places that are not always comfortable. Do you really think handing over that plant to that woman was easy for me? Absolutely not. It was not. I was very uncomfortable, but, God doesn't want us to live our lives on a fluffy pillow...we are coming alive, and growing in our faith when we are most uncomfortable.
This morning I fell to my knees....and it was there that I thanked God for where we are as a family...we are rich in blessings, but, we still have endless growth to do together as individuals, and as a family. So, today, God...keep me moving toward things of your will and desire...keep me loving my family with a kind and giving heart...help me to be self-less. And, thank you for my morning that had me down on my knees.
Yesterday in the sermon something hit me really hard, and I'm not sure what happened, but, God was sure speaking to my heart. I've felt the power and knocking of God many times, but, this was a bit different. This was very clear...very profound...and I listened. There is this woman in my life, and she will be there for a very long time I do believe. But, her and I never really got along...things are better than they were, but, still they will never be perfect..I'm just sure of it. God put it on my heart to do something nice for her. Hum...do something nice for someone who I feel has put me though so much agony!? Ugh...I'd rather not...that was the very "human" very un-Godly voice that washed over me...but, then....there came God again... He lightened my heart..and I took her a plant. This woman was grateful, and she was kind...dare I tell you, she was even complimentary..and I was of her also. God is amazing...and to you these are tiny baby-steps...but, they are tiny baby-steps toward something greater, and I am safe in saying it was God's will.
So, today, as my morning was chaos....Monday morning craziness, we all have it. But, once I got my 1 year old baby girl to nap (finally) I sat down to start reading a book...and, this book is a blessing. God was showing me that other mothers in this world are tired too! God was showing me through this book that other women are not perfect, either! These words in this book were a gift to me today...I sat down the few pages I had started reading...shut my front door....and right there...amiss the Lego's strewn about I was on my knees in prayer. This was different than it was 4 years ago. I was not in desperation...I was in gratitude....don't get me wrong, I was asking God for his guidance, wisdom, and continued grace in this season of my life....but, this was not a lost prayer. This was a prayer of thankfulness and request for continued blessings, this was a prayer for God to keep moving me toward places that are not always comfortable. Do you really think handing over that plant to that woman was easy for me? Absolutely not. It was not. I was very uncomfortable, but, God doesn't want us to live our lives on a fluffy pillow...we are coming alive, and growing in our faith when we are most uncomfortable.
This morning I fell to my knees....and it was there that I thanked God for where we are as a family...we are rich in blessings, but, we still have endless growth to do together as individuals, and as a family. So, today, God...keep me moving toward things of your will and desire...keep me loving my family with a kind and giving heart...help me to be self-less. And, thank you for my morning that had me down on my knees.